Life Lesson Learned: That first dance on stage never gets less nerve-racking
I did it. I tap danced on stage again after a 19-year hiatus.
And, unsurprisingly, I loved it!
The last time I blogged about dance, I was just a month or two into taking classes here through our Rabbit Run Community Arts Association. I was having a blast, but hadn’t even given the winter/spring session much thought, let alone whether or not I would participate in the recital. As the holiday season was approaching, my instructor, Kara, suggested I join the intermediate class after Christmas as they weren’t much farther along instruction-wise than I was at that point. (My extremely small beginner class meant lots of one-on-one time, which made it easy to catch up!)
Considering how excited I was to return to tapping as an adult, I would have been a fool to not continue with it in the winter. Of course, that meant cutting into my busy Thursday night of putting laundry away and passing out in front of the television, but hey, sometimes you need to make sacrifices, right?
So I spent the second session with a lovely group of dancers, and together we learned two different numbers to perform in May, which brings us to our recital….
About a week before the event, it really started to hit me that I was going to be on stage, performing, in front of….you know…people. I knew both routines quite well at that point (much to the dismay of my two pets, who probably rolled their eyes every time I cued up the songs to rehearse), but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little worried about screwing up on stage.
As the big weekend (which also fell on Mother’s Day this year) approached, I was a mix of anxiety and giddiness. Even something as simple as getting ready gave me butterflies, yet I was stressed worrying about how long it was going to take me. Plus, I was a Nervous Nelly about the actual process of getting dressed. Hair and makeup? Fun! Trying to squeeze into fishnet tights without tearing a big hole in them? Big yikes! (Thank God dance tights are of a high quality because I might as well have the nails of a raptor when I need to shimmy into nylons).
What made things particularly….interesting…was the amount of layers my costume involved. We were told we could change at intermission, but I opted to not worry about it and instead took the route of walking around like a human onion. Fishnets, black shorts, leotard, black dance pants and costume jacket—in that order. But hey, everything fit so no complaints there….until I had to take a bathroom break about five minutes after putting on all of those layers. Pretty sure I burned just as many calories un-layering as I did dancing on stage.
Much like my childhood recitals, there was a mandatory rehearsal the day before. Thankfully in this case, they also wanted everyone to practice in costume, which makes it so much easier to get used to what it’s going to be like trying to move around in whatever you’re wearing.
Another nice surprise was that optional dance photos were also being taken at the school before your rehearsal time. (When I was a kid we used to have a separate photo day and we had to go to the actual photography studio to get them done). I really loved the costume, so I ended up getting a solo shot as well as a group photo (though we were short one member who was on a plane home from England!). I haven’t received the photos yet, but I’m excited to see them and add them to my scrapbook!
While we were waiting to go on stage for our scheduled rehearsal time, Kara gave me a brief tour of Harvey High School’s first floor since it was my first time there. Unfortunately my old high school has a stage but lacks permanent seating and a dressing room, so there’s no way to hold plays or recitals there. I was just impressed that Harvey had actual dressing rooms, and they were connected right to a backstage door which I thought was handy.
Our actual rehearsal went smoothly! Unfortunately, the actual stage was anything but smooth. It had such an odd “sticky” sensation that each one of us were taken aback by how it felt in our shoes. It was great for keeping dancers from slipping, but it did muffle the sounds of our tapping in a way that our usual studio floor doesn’t. Oh well, what can you do?
Before I knew it, we had run through both numbers a few times and with my eyes burning from the sweat brought on by the hot stage lights, it was time to head back home.
On recital day, the nerves will still hovering, but at least I had mastered the art of peeling off my layers on a bathroom break…one less thing to worry about! Being Mother’s Day, my parents and I went to the school together so we could leave together afterwards, so the two of them just killed time in the parking lot eating lunch while I hung out in the dressing room with everyone else.
I was so glad I didn’t have any kind of major costume change or preparation to take care of once I got there. I was stressed enough just watching the high school girls get ready. We adults basically just stayed out of their way and rehearsed off in our own little corner of the hallway!
The wait to go backstage for our first number felt like an eternity! It was also challenging because we nearly had to tip toe through both the dressing room and hallway area to avoid making too much off-stage noise. Easier said than done when your shoes make you sound like a horse!
After a bit of a wait, the time came for us to take our places on the stage. Thankfully, they keep the curtain closed between numbers, which gives everyone time to get ready in their spot. As the curtain opened, we were ready to go in our opening poses. I may be coordinated when it comes to dance, but I’m also the kind of person to trip over furniture and walk into walls. So having to hold this pose without toppling over was quite the feat.
To make matters worse, the music had a delayed start, so I watched my legs start to shake out of nerves. I remember thinking, “Oh God, I’m going to fall over like one of those fainting goats aren’t I? Can they see my legs shaking? Is it that obvious? Where’s the music? Am I dreaming?” Longest one hour….I mean one minute… ever!
I was in the front for this dance so I was unable to see how we all did as a group, but from what I could tell, it went great! The number was a laid-back “jazzy” routine choreographed to a song called “New York, I love it when you’re mean.” Given my history with NYC I absolutely loved the song, and my mom also said she found it catchy!
The curtain closed, we all breathed a sigh of relief, and then it was time to wait for the next number taking place after intermission. I never thought I would be so happy to take off leggings and walk around with my bare legs in fish neck stockings. It may have been air conditioned in the school, but we were still hot! I probably would have walked around in a bikini at that point.
With our first dance over, it gave us time to focus primarily on preparing for our faster number called “Rose.” Honestly, I think every single one of us was more stressed about this particular performance for our own reasons. For me, I was hoping I had enough energy and stamina to get me through, even though the song was on the shorter side. (It’s a good thing the recital is in the spring–there’s no way I would have been able to get through it in the fall when I was so out of shape).
Thankfully, I remembered the choreography and managed to not look like an overexcited dog wheezing for breath. Win-win!
And just like that….my 2023 recital experience had come to close! (But before staying backstage to watch the advanced class perform one last time. They were fantastic, and I was impressed by both their energy and ability to remember all of that choreography!)
My thought the second the show ended: “Okay, who’s ready for next year?!”
I already can’t wait to receive my copy of the recital and re-live the fun until class resumes in September!
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Life Lesson Learned: If you know what you’re doing, you should try and look like you know what you’re doing
As a kid, the annual recital was easily my favorite time of year. Unfortunately, it was also the most stressful time of year, compounded by the fact that my dance teacher/owner of the school was particularly on edge in the spring. (Then again, when wasn’t she on edge?) Looking back, I understand why she was under so much pressure; it was her name and reputation on the line, not to mention she was the only teacher and choreographer for the entire show. That being said, we were a recreational studio, and screaming if a kid misses a step is completely uncalled for.
I performed in three of the school’s recitals, though unfortunately I have very limited memory of my first year. Having VHS tapes (yes, I’m that old) of the other two recitals is such a treat and brings back fond memories of the entire experience. In fact, I watched them both this past spring to reminisce while I eagerly anticipated this year’s upcoming performance.
Unlike the Rabbit Run recital, these were always held on Saturday night, with rehearsal taking place after school on Friday. I absolutely loved rehearsal as it was the only time I was able to watch the other classes’ routines until we received the VHS recording later that summer. It was fun to see what everyone had been up to over the past year, and of course, when you’re young, you get to look up to the older girls and hope you’ll be just as amazing when you reach their age. Another difference: We also all rehearsed in regular dance wear instead of costumes. At the time, it did an extra element of surprise and magic finally getting to see everyone in their costumes the next night.
One thing that hasn’t changed? When you aren’t performing (and I’m sure all the audience members waiting to see a certain relative or friend on stage can agree), dance recitals are long. I always thought it was smart that my dance instructor hired high school students to look after the younger classes to make sure they were safe, ready to go on stage and entertained while waiting around for their next number. In fact, the littlest kids usually brought along coloring books to keep busy. Can we make that socially acceptable to do as an adult dancer?
My last two years taking dance, I performed in three numbers in each recital: jazz, tap and ballet. I’m proud that I remembered all of my choreography because that’s quite a lot for a kid!
But as I was watching the tapes this spring, I couldn’t help but laugh during our “ballet” number choreographed to “You’ve Got a Friend in Me.” I have no doubt that I knew what I was supposed to be doing, yet I spent almost the entire number staring at the girl next to me. I have no idea why! It would have made me laugh more if I hadn’t been in the front row twisting my neck sideways like I had slept on it oddly. Thankfully, that wasn’t a habit I kept up for all of my numbers, but it’s definitely not one of my finest moments! (Second place goes to me rubbing my runny nose during a very classic ballet number. Sigh).
Even to this day, I appreciate that my former teacher often formed a theme for the recital (my fourth grade recital had an entire section dedicated to ABBA) or grouped like numbers together with a cute little title like “The Magic Forest.” She also choreographed classical ballet and tap quite well, I must say. My tap routines were so fun that I still remember them both! (I even performed one of them in my elementary school talent show).
There was always a twinge of sadness when we all gathered on stage for the finale, because after such a fun weekend and a school year’s worth of anticipation, you had to say goodbye to it all again until the fall.
Then it was back to another 10 months of my teacher scaring the crap out of everyone and students panicking about remembering their choreography until that one weekend that somehow made it all worth it.
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